Gaining Your Brother (or Sister) (3)

“But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.’ And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.” Matthew 18:16-17

When a brother or sister sins, the goal is to bring repentance and restoration to the Lord. Ideally, you can go to them, “tell him his fault between you and him alone” and they will listen and positively respond (Matt 18:15). But Jesus knows that it’s not always that easy.

If someone refuses to repent of sin when it is shown to them it is tempting to just leave it there, to think, “I did my part and there’s nothing more to be done.” But Jesus knows it is serious and tells us to try harder.

We care so much for our brother or sister in sin that, if our conversations with those in sin don’t produce repentance, we will follow Jesus’ instruction and “take with you one or two more” (Matt 18:16). This follows the Biblical principle of providing faithful witnesses. First, they witness (testify) to the one in sin that they truly ARE in sin and according to the Lord need to repent. Second, they are witnesses to whether the person is penitent or not. Hopefully, it will be harder for a person to deny or remain in their sin when facing additional people who care for their soul.

But what if a person stubbornly remains in their sin even when they are talked to by multiple people? Jesus says, “And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church” (Matt 18:17). The meaning here is that the whole church will try to help the person see their sin and its seriousness. The whole church will be praying for them and reaching out to talk and study and correct and rebuke. It’s not an easy thing to do, but it is an expression of deep love and concern – and to try to gain our brother or sister.

Jesus says, “But if he refuses to even hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector” (Matt 18:17). This doesn’t mean that we hate them or have absolutely no contact with them. It means that we recognize they have returned to the world, they are choosing to remain in sin like other sinners who refuse to repent. Our relationship with them changes, but they aren’t our enemy (and we continue to try to teach and correct them as we have opportunity – 2 Thess 3:14-15). It’s not easy. It’s not pleasant. But Jesus says it is how we try to gain our brother or sister.     dd